The Midlife Reframe

Category: single mom

  • Year End Round Up!

    Well, we’re almost there.

    The end of another year.  Sitting back and reflecting on what has gone by and what we will be working towards in 2015.

    Getting close to Christmas always make me reflect and think about the time I get to spend with my family and friends.  They have supported me through so much over the past while and I love them so much.  I am looking forward to spending some much deserved time with them over the holidays 🙂

    Over the past year I have noticed so much.  I am beginning to think it’s because I am over 40 now, lol.

    So, what’s going on with me fitness wise?

    With my surgery date up in the air, it is hard for me to forge ahead with races and registrations, as it could be late 2015 before I am able to run again.

    A lot of my time has been moving towards yoga with light cardio and starting back up with weight training.  Keeping up with my fitness will ensure a better recovery after surgery.

    What have I been thinking about?

    Having a mental illness has made me sit down and think of the ways I can cope better now that the “dark times” have descended on us weather wise, and to use those skills throughout the year.  Fitness has always served me well, and this year I have added steady meditation to the mix.  This has certainly helped, but I still need to realize that I will have bad days and not beat myself up over them.  There will be days I will just want to live in my nest, and that’s okay.

    A big “thing” for me is sleep.  Sleep is very important.  For both physical and mental health.  I have been tracking my sleep for the past 16 weeks. My average sleep efficiency has been 93% over those past weeks.  I am finding this a great tool.

      

    Last night wasn’t super – but yay deep sleep!


    And hey, thanks for coming along with me so far!!

    Starting this blog has been an adventure and something I am very proud of.  (With the craziness and chaos of life, I am able to say that I now learned that writing and scheduling my posts are the way to go!!)  I have “met” some fantastic people and looking forward to what the New Year brings for myself and for the blog 🙂 

    You knew there had to be a badass drawing! 😉

    What’s on for 2015?

    As I look ahead, I am hoping to share more with you about my journey with surgery, recovery and my plans to become a Certified Yoga Teacher in 2016!  Adding yoga to my fitness regime has been a blessing.  It has allowed me to slow down, learn to breathe, and brought some peace to my hectic life.  To share this with others would be awesome.

    I will still be me….you won’t see anything different here on the blog, other than some cooooooool super awesome pics like THIS!

    I look awesome-er in X-Ray vision!!

    So.

    To sign off for my last MAJOR blog post of 2014 (because there will be the small random super fun holiday posts!) I wish everyone the most happiest of the Season.  Spend time with those you love.  Hug them.  Enjoy them 🙂


     #crazymamaruns


  • Mom Post – Overwhelmed and Holding it Together

    It’s that time of year.

    Getting close to the Holidays (I know we’re not THAT close, but it is gonna sneak up on you I tell ya!) and my brain is close to being fried.


    Keeping myself on track, happy, healthy and on top of all my tasks is becoming overwhelming.  I have things to keep me on track, don’t get me wrong: Reminders, Apps, Calendar Appointments.

    I just feel like I am drowning.  Like there are not enough hours in the day.

    Work is becoming crazier.  It’s that “let’s get it all done before the end of the year” push.  Piles of paper and boxes are everywhere.  Nerves are frazzled.

    Then, there is getting everyone’s Christmas Gifts made/purchased (I do not like being a last minute shopper) while completing other projects for paying customers….hibernation seems like a great idea.

    It is during times like these that I just want to sit down and cry.  For real.

    But, as a single mom I have to keep it together, without losing myself to the chaos.  I do have a great support system.  Some days it’s good to know I can just rant and they will listen.  But some days I just don’t want to burden them, because I am just so tired and don’t want to talk.

    So at night, before I go to bed, I sit.

    And breathe.

    Just for a couple of minutes.

    And then, I may or may not scream into my pillow, depending on the day.

    But I take comfort in knowing that I am not alone.  That moms everywhere are sharing my plight, and are in the exact position I am – whether you are a stay at home mom, or a working mom.

    We all get overwhelmed.  And we all collectively scream into our pillows.

    So if you will excuse me, even though it is mid-day, I think I need to scream into MY pillow.

    #crazymamaruns

     

     

  • Something Serious…

    I’ve talked about it before.

    This whole issue surrounding mental illness and it’s stigma.

    I told my story in a previous post (the short and sweet version) but still I hear of so may of those suffering and who are pushed aside.

    These aren’t celebrities.  These are your everyday people.  Mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers, lawyers, doctors, police officers, men and women who serve our country, and I could go on.

    To belittle a mental illness takes us back to the days where they would not bury mentally ill people in the church yard because they had “demons”.

    This illness is real.  To ask for help is hard.  To accept you are ill with something no one can “see” is harder.

    When someone shares the fact that they have mental illness, they trust you.  Trust you enough to not turn away in disgust or pity.

    And even if help is given and accepted, we have setbacks.  Just like every other illness.  Sometimes treatment is a life long thing.  The battle is a daily one.

    People with mental illness need to know they matter.

    We don’t want to be treated differently.  But we do want people to understand.

    Sometimes our bad days are really bad.  To go outside and face the world too overwhelming.

    We didn’t chose this.  We didn’t ask for it.  We don’t want to “stay that way”.

    We are sick.

    We are human.

    We matter.

       

  • Total October Randomness

    Here we go!

     This is what I am doing right now….running while I can!

    I see the surgeon in 20 days.  So as long as it is not torrential downpour or hurricane force winds, I am going to try and get as much running time in as is humanly possible.

    I’m not going gangbusters mind you, but with the thought of being laid up for possibly 6-8 weeks and then recovery…well I am going to get it all in.

    Same with my yoga.  Home and at the studio.  I will practice every day!

    I want to be in great condition so I can kickass in recovery.

    The better shape I am in, the quicker my recovery time.

    And now…..other ramblings….

    So, as some of you know, I am a single mom.  This is both challenging and rewarding.  Challenging when the other parent is not involved, but rewarding because I see the awesome human I am raising on my own.  

    There have been times when I have doubted the job I am doing, just like every other parent.  Parenting is hard, period.  Even with both parents.  There are times you doubt every decision you make. 

    As parents, we are always hard on ourselves.  Harder than anyone else would be on US.  We keep our doubts and inner criticisms to ourselves.  No parent is perfect, no matter people may think or say.  We’ve all made mistakes and we learn from that.  We need to help each other out.  Give each other some pats on the back.  This is one hard gig!

    And then more randomness today because sometimes….

    I get the schlumpies.

    That’s what I call my bad days with depression.  The days I want to hibernate.  

    I find it gets worse when I don’t see the sun for more than 2 days.  

    No matter how much I run, how much I yoga, sometimes they just come along and pull the rug out from beneath me.

    Rude, yes.  I just find ways to get through them.  Whether it’s medidation, chocolate or some downtime with Netflix, I make it.  If it is really bad, I reach out, because sometimes the schlumpies leak out my eyes.

    In the end…

    I am still here.  Grateful for everything I have.  Grateful for everyone in my life.  Grateful for those who didn’t hang around.  I try to learn from every experience, good or bad.  There is a lesson in everything if you step back and look.

    Am I stubborn? Yes.  Will I make decisions that suck?  Yes.  But I get up the next day and start over.  Every day is a new beginning.  Yesterday is gone.  Put your feet on the ground and start over.

    It’s the best part, starting over.

    I’ve done it a lot.  You can too 🙂

    Sending out high fives and hugs!  We are all doing the best we can to get through this life.