The Midlife Reframe

Category: apartment

  • Post Covid, Vacation, and other Random Things

    Well, let me tell you one thing. Covid wasn’t great. Sickest I’ve been in a while. My taste and smell are coming back, as well as my energy.

    I am currently on vacation, so it was great to have the time off to get better. By the time week one was done I was starting to enjoy my time.

    I was able to get my room sorted with the help of my daughter. My depression had been living in my room for quite some time. Got a full garbage bag full of stuff to turf. Some time this week I’ll tackle my closet, which is a whole different beast.

    Mid clean…I should have done a before shot.
    So much clutter gone!

    Reset my coffee station by my bed. I had lots of pods that were buried in the mess my room had become.

    We have a bunch of stuff that we are purging, so once it stops raining I’ll be lugging stuff out so our downstairs doesn’t look like a bad thrift store.

    Having a mental illness affects so much in your life. I will feel so much better once we’re not surrounded by items we no longer use/that are broken. Clutter in the brain and clutter in the house is not a good combo.

    About a year ago I wrote about my weight gain and my struggles with it. I have accepted where I am with it, and now that my energy is returning I can get back to being active again. Movement is good for the body and the brain. My running may take a bit to come back, but that’s okay. Slow and steady for a full return is better than no return at all.

    I was able to participate in the Pride Parade this past weekend, and was light headed afterwards, so I know what my limit is right now. Thanks Covid.

    All in all, things are okay right now. Taking this break is really making a difference. I am feeling rested.

    Now to continue my de-depressioning of this apartment by finishing up laundry and getting the kitchen sorted.

    Let’s go!

  • Unpacking My Shit: Plant Style

    So one of the things that has come from the unpacking of the shit has been how uncomfortable my apartment has been feeling (you know, besides the messy depression mess that seems to never go away, bastard).

    I have plants in my temporary office space, and I realized just how much more comfortable it feels having some green life around .

    I have now been on a mission to green up my place.

    Note: it can be expensive to buy bigger plants so I have been buying a lot of babies.

    In true mental illness fashion, I need all the plants and do all the research which equals obsessed, but I see this as a good obsession.

    I am starting to feel more comfortable and have new friends to take care of…..and keep alive.

    Also, it is hard to stay off of plant ordering websites: don’t…. look…. at….. them…. Amy.

    Let’s hope I don’t kill these new friends.

    (Thank goodness for plant apps with info and watering reminders!!)

    So, expect the odd obsessive plant post as I start my journey as a plant mom 😊

    Yay plants!

    Plaaaaaaaaaaaants.

  • Amy’s Anxiety and The Tub

    (Oh how I wish this post was about ice cream…..)

    May 9, 2018:

    So,

    Here I am awake at 11:27pm.

    You’re like…uhhhhh, and?

    Well, I am usually in extreme super sleep right now, because sleep and I are tight.  We have a very good relationship.  Amy + Sleep = BFFs.

    But NOT TONIGHT.

    (Backstory:  We have had some issues since the “new people” moved in next door a while back.  Tub filling up when we shower, or slow draining, etc.  Superintendent has been in, put magic potion in the drains. Drains get back to happy. Yay!  As a backup, I also have been trying to keep happy drains by continuing to use our hair catchers – because two girls and hair – and the occasional magic potion when the slow drain reappeared.)

    8:30pm:  Person I birthed has shower.  Advises tub filled to ankles.  Mother is exhausted so waits until she goes to brush teeth to check tub.

    9:30:  Tub still full of water.  Mother aggravated.

    Mother is so goddamn exhausted and thinks “I cannot do this right now”, and tries to sleep. She can’t. Because anger and anxiety.

    So, Mother searches for any other solution as it is getting late and doesn’t want to bug Superintendent. Nothing works.

    So – mentally ill Mother gets mentally ill Daughter and we begin scooping water out of tub and putting it down bathroom sink.  Notice water coming into tub.  Girl child goes: uh, is that grass?  Is that a leaf?  (I kid you not).

    I am ANGRY.  What in the actual fuck are you doing over there you idiots that live next door?

    Writes note to Superintendent. Puts in special slot beside Superintendent’s door.

    Starts planning curse to put on next door neighbours.

    Brain is in overdrive.

    May never sleep again.

    (Well, okay, I probably will sleep, but it will be horrible sleep and I’ll be cranky because my tub will probably still have water/crud in it tomorrow morning – rawr!!!)

    Okay, now it’s 11:44.  I decide I better try and sleep before tomorrow.

    Does get to sleep.

    May 10, 2018:

    Wakes up at usual time.

    THE TUB STILL HAS STANDING WATER.

    I would put a pic in, but gag.

    So, I baby wipe bathe and get ready for work.

    I am a rage ball today and am now constructing a text to my Superintendent.

    I apologize in advance for all of my feelings today that may come forth as anger towards those I adore.

    Ummmmm, Happy Thursday?!?!

    @crazymamaruns